Author Topic: The counceling session.  (Read 575 times)

Augie

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The counceling session.
« on: April 04, 2018, 06:31:22 PM »
What do I know about those, (not much) but I think the counselor would get more straight info just watching Victoria’s face.......the fear.....distrust.....almost hatred of JT (?) when she looked at him and JT’s calm smooth talk that made him ‘look’ reasonable here.  Just my opinion watching them today.  She should dump JT..  I doubt if he will change his opinion of himself.
« Last Edit: April 04, 2018, 07:20:44 PM by Augie »

Twokeets

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #1 on: April 04, 2018, 07:21:43 PM »
I'm sure a good counsellor would get as much info from body language as actual words. People must lie sometimes, intentionally or not, but their actions can be telling.

Peridot

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #2 on: April 04, 2018, 07:37:25 PM »
I realize the counselor doesn't know Victoria and J.T.'s history but since I do, I'd love to hand her a bunch of questions.  To start, I'd address Victoria's pattern of allowing a stream of men into her home where young children live.  Also, Victoria's propensity to jump into marriage but her seeming inability to sustain any long-term relationship.  If the counselor knew how many times Victoria has been married I hope she'd ask V what she thinks is going to be different this time.  Naturally, this doesn't excuse J.T.'s behavior but for Vicky to even consider marrying him again shows she has issues.

Next, I'd address what factors have caused J.T.'s negative behavior to escalate over the years.  We saw not one sign of abuse during Victoria and J.T.'s first marriage.  Had there been any, surely the judge wouldn't have been so quick to grant J.T. full custody of Reed over Victoria.  Also no reports of abuse with J.T. and Mac until recently.  If J.T. was so awful, why did she have 2 kids with him?  I'm scratching my head here.  The writers need to give us more info.  As it is, I feel like they're using J.T. as a convenient tool to do a domestic abuse PSA.  If they were so anxious to tackle this issue with a long-standing character, they've had the perfect candidate all along:  Victor.
« Last Edit: April 04, 2018, 07:37:57 PM by Peridot »

Capricorn

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #3 on: April 04, 2018, 07:41:46 PM »
What? Victor an abuser?  :o


Writer's brain = St. Victor  who does everything for his family, he loves them so much.  ::)


DIE VICTOR! DIE!

Soaprah

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #4 on: April 04, 2018, 09:48:18 PM »
  If J.T. was so awful, why did she have 2 kids with him?  I'm scratching my head here.   


Mac did say JT changed during the marriage. Victoria said it too. In many cases of domestic abuse, the man comes on as charming at the beginning-- until he gets bored, and/or sees he's got the woman just where he wants her and starts to exert control. By that time, there are often children. I know of one abuser who said to his wife, "Maybe if we had another baby, I'll straighten out." They already had four children. The woman said no, and left her husband soon after. It was very, very difficult.
Also, the woman can be caught up in denial: "This can't be happening." "Things will improve if I just...." "He really is a good person and didn't mean it." Thursday's US show reveals the abused woman's dilemma very well by having Victoria talk to the counsellor about her doubts. The writing for this plot line is good, showing how tempting it is, especially if you have issues with self worth, to go back to the abuser time and again. I just hope that because so many of us don't like the character of Victoria, we don't blame the victim. Nobody deserves to be treated this way.   

Capricorn

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #5 on: April 04, 2018, 10:09:00 PM »
Most women who are abused have children and they stay out of fear and/or the feeling that they can't provide for the children if they leave.   The sons of abusive fathers sometimes grow up to abuse their wives too.   The daughters of such a family sometimes gravitate toward men who abuse them too.   It's a vicious circle of life for some of the abused, the abuser and their children.

LeannaLove

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #6 on: April 04, 2018, 11:04:23 PM »

DIE VICTOR! DIE!

Great to see the movement spreading.  #DieVictorDie    ;)

Soaprah

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #7 on: April 04, 2018, 11:07:30 PM »
Most women who are abused have children and they stay out of fear and/or the feeling that they can't provide for the children if they leave.   The sons of abusive fathers sometimes grow up to abuse their wives too.   The daughters of such a family sometimes gravitate toward men who abuse them too.   It's a vicious circle of life for some of the abused, the abuser and their children.


Yes. It is very sad.

DebR

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #8 on: April 04, 2018, 11:14:15 PM »
I think in one session the counselor could tell by their answers.  J.T. answered once a month that they argue and Victoria quickly corrected him by answering itís twice a week lately.


Iíve known many women who were abused.  One woman was beaten all the time and she stayed because she blamed his drinking.  When she finally had enough, he got help because he knew she was leaving and he didnít want to lose her and the kids.


The couple live in my town now after knowing them when my husband and I were single and dating.  They are still together and happily married and are the only couple I have known who stayed together after an abusive marriage.  I donít know how the woman made it through.

LeannaLove

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #9 on: April 04, 2018, 11:31:23 PM »
If J.T. was so awful, why did she have 2 kids with him?  I'm scratching my head here. 

Here are a few possible reasons:  Thinking "he'll change" after the abuser tearfully swears that "it'll never happen again."  Fear.  Shame.  Love.  Denial.

I've been blessed in my life to have a wonderful marriage of almost 23 years to a gentle man who rarely even raises his voice much less his hands to me or our sons.  He's as un-controlling as a personality can possibly be.  But I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse so I understand the shame attached to this issue.

We've made progress in not blaming the victim but there's still major strides that need to be made.

But I do agree with you, Peridot, that a domestic abuse story with Victor as the abuser would be be fitting as well.

Peridot

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #10 on: April 05, 2018, 07:32:07 PM »
I suppose there could be any number of reasons for the change in J.T., I just wish they'd give us one or two.  J.T. was always sort of a bad boy when he was younger, but I also remember him being very loving with Brittany, Mac, Colleen, and also Victoria when they were together.  They could claim J.T. got "rewired" during the electrocution and I'd be satisfied.  For J.T. to suddenly become abusive makes no more sense to me than having them go that route with Jack, or Billy, or Devon.  I'm also wondering if they're using this story as a device to garner sympathy for Victoria, since it seems hardly anyone has been able to stand her for the past year.

On a side note, the actors are doing a terrific job with the material.  It can't be easy playing this kind of stuff opposite the person you used to be married to.  J.T. and Victoria's scenes are making me increasingly uncomfortable and I give Heinle and Luckinbill a lot of credit for conveying all the complex emotions involved.

deirdra

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #11 on: April 06, 2018, 01:36:20 PM »
They could claim J.T. got "rewired" during the electrocution and I'd be satisfied.
They probably will. LOL.  Jana Hawkes developed a brain tumah and murderous tendencies after being locked in a restaurant fridge when it was burned down.  Anything is possible on Y&R.
« Last Edit: April 06, 2018, 01:41:51 PM by deirdra »

Soaprah

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #12 on: April 06, 2018, 08:50:03 PM »
I think it would not be helpful if the writers blame JT's abusive ways on electrocution or some other unusual reason. That might lead viewers who are in the same situation to think their partners couldn't possible be abusive because they hadn't been electrocuted, etc.
The truth is that spousal abuse is more pervasive than we know, and it happens in all types of relationships, for all kinds of reasons. It can be triggered by several factors, such as sudden, extreme, or prolonged stress, as well as job loss, unemployment, addiction, or mental or physical illness.
« Last Edit: April 06, 2018, 08:50:42 PM by Soaprah »

deirdra

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Re: The counceling session.
« Reply #13 on: April 07, 2018, 11:56:43 AM »
I think it would not be helpful if the writers blame JT's abusive ways on electrocution or some other unusual reason. That might lead viewers who are in the same situation to think their partners couldn't possible be abusive because they hadn't been electrocuted, etc.
The truth is that spousal abuse is more pervasive than we know, and it happens in all types of relationships, for all kinds of reasons. It can be triggered by several factors, such as sudden, extreme, or prolonged stress, as well as job loss, unemployment, addiction, or mental or physical illness.
ITA.  And TPTB should not just drop the story as if it never existed if/when JT leaves town.